My Rapist Father is My Pimp?

Does this title shock you? Are you rattled that someone would be bold enough to write such a thing?

Unfortunately, waking up to your rapist father also raping and pimping you out is a very real horror for untold children and young girls in our country. This was my reality.

I am a person conceived in incest/rape and a woman who has survived sexual assault and sex-trafficking at the hands of my biological father, step-father and other men for 16 years and several stand-alone rapes in my adult years. From all the years of sexual assaults and trafficking, I know of numerous pregnancies as a result. Sadly, I lost my babies conceived from sex trafficking through physically forced abortion.  The child conceived from the stranger rape was lost through miscarriage. I have spent the last four and a half years of my life researching in detail the plight of moms who get pregnant from sexual assault and the people (from the preborn to those alive today) who were conceived from sexual assault. Children conceived from sex-slavery/trafficking fall into this category.

While I experienced sex-slavery and trafficking, it didn’t hit me that the women trapped in this life would full under sexual assault conception until I began to dig deeper into my own story. As I realized that had I not been rescued by my church pastor in my sixteenth year of life, my stepfather would have continued to trafficked me. He had introduced me to a group of men and women who met at an indescriptive house to trade me and use me how they wished. There were also places around town that were used as meeting places. I was told just how beautiful and desirable I was.  Men would look on me as though they owned my body. I didn’t have a choice to say NO! I was told that I brought it on myself.

As I realized that I had not miscarried that first child that I saw leave me or any of there other children during those years, I remembered what really happened! It was then that the entire world of prostitution and sex trafficking changed for me.

While I have actually been pimped out to other men by my rapists and abusers, I also know what it is like to have my biological rapist father take what he wants from me. Despair and hopelessness filled my soul because for a time, it seemed that no matter where I turned, no one saw me! No one saw the blood running from my wounds. Family didn’t see it. “Friends” didn’t see it. There was no way out!

The GOOD CHRISTIANS looked the other way and said that I asked for it!

Do you realize how many young women in the trafficking industry are raped by the fathers that raped and impregnated their mothers?

They are being raped and pimped out by their biological fathers! Look at the sweet face of the baby girl in the picture above. She was already violated at that age by her rapist father! LET THAT SINK IN! Who will speak for her?

I am the little babe in the picture above. My innocence taken at nine months by my biological father who raped his teen daughter. He took me and abused and raped me until I was ten years old. I will be the voice that no one was for me and the voice of so many like me.

 Each of our cities and towns cry with the voices of the children and young ladies being raised by their rapist fathers who are now repeating the same horrid crimes and selling them for profit. Are your eyes and ears open? Can you see the trail of blood and tears? These ladies shop with us in the convenience stores, pass us with their heads down, yet are praying that we see their cries for help. So often we look right passed them.

I write this blog because I know that Christ Jesus loves each of these women! His heart aches for them. It is angered at the horrors that they live in each moment that they breathe. His tears fall for them when we look away. WILL YOU CONTINUE TO LOOK AWAY? WILL YOU REMAIN SILENT? We are called to speak up for those that do not have a voice! WILL YOU BE THAT VOICE? I, ROWENA ABIGAIL SLUSSER, WILL BE A VOICE!  

This issue can seem so overwhelming and heartbreaking. It can seem that there is no way to overcome such evil, but God’s word tells us that Christ in us is Greater that the evil one in the world! We fight in the Power of Christ Jesus. So, pick up your Sword and take your stand.

For more information on my organization, please visit http://www.facebook.com/treasureofvirtue

Close My Eyes and Run

I was playing a game on my phone, losing over and over at a particular level. Frustration started to overtake me. Ha! Over a silly game, my emotions were having a party. I have experienced bigger failures than losing at a phone game, and not felt so defeated. I know that I can beat this level with just a few more moves. The thing is I don’t have any more moves left. I am running in circles in my head trying to figure out how to outsmart this level, and then It hits me. He hits me with an “aha” moment. This is what I look like when I try to run the race on my own. Do you know what I am talking about?

In the phone game, I can earn or buy power-ups or extra lives. In real life, I am either running on my own steam or by His strength. I cannot earn or buy anything to help me. There is only one name that has the power to redeem, rescue and save me in my race. So often as a Christian, it is easy to forget just how much the Gospel still applies to me. It applies to every part of my race to the finish line, to the goal. As today moved on, I struggled with the fact that until I have finished the race, I will carry this battle-worn body. This body and earthly mind have all the wounds and scars of the years of abuse. Just like in the game, I could run in circles trying to bypass what the Lord is walking me through on my own, or surrender to the difficult path and allow Him to do the work of unraveling my broken and messy heart. 

Unlike my phone game, I didn’t succumb to failure. Instead, I journaled, turned on praise music and let my heart be free before the Founder and Perfecter of my faith, Christ Jesus.(Hebrews 12:1-2) Out of this time of unsettled waters, came the poem below. It is deep and real. I pray that anyone feeling trapped in any kind of abuse or trafficking would know that there is Power and hope in the Name of Christ. Please reach out. 

Close My Eyes


Close my eyes, I hear a song
His hands move to the beat
Rushing, rushing, beating, slow. 
Tears escape as I pray for the day to end
Day one


Close my eyes, I hear it again
Hands move to the beat, different hands with his.
Rushing, beating, slow and repeat
Tears sink deep as I pray for the day or maybe the week to end.
Two


Close my body, I see the song play
So many hands move to the beat, money and words mixing
Rushing, beating, slow and repeat.
Babies removed as tears rush through my prayers for the years to end
Three


Close my eyes, I hear a song
Hands all around, don’t skip a beat
Rushing, beating, slow and repeat.
Tears, tears as I ask when will I belong to me?
Four, Five, Six and on and on.


Close my eyes, I hear a song
Redemption’s Hands lift me up
Ragged, blood rushing, heart half-beating
Slowly tears of relief come
Dear Christ Jesus: Day One

Copyright 6July2020 Rowena Slusser